Tag Archives: sex

Old Ladies Slip into Bikini’s and Get Freaky Nasty with Power Tools

Guess it must be Friday. Also, hands off Clara. SHE’S MINE! Continue reading

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Are Uncircumcised Penises Weird?

Do women really think uncircumcised penises are weird? Continue reading

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Super Sexy CPR

check out this CPR education video, filmed like a porno. Continue reading

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Knock Knock. Who’s There? Dog Poop

Dogs poop cats, or didn’t you know? Continue reading

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The Zach Galifianakis Swimsuit Calendar

Beardless, glistening, sand-in-the-crotch. These pics are gonna make a lots of little girls and boys grow up overnight. You’re welcome, America. Continue reading

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Oh Yes, There is A Sexy Chewbacca Costume

Thanks to Halloween and and seriously misplace sexual impulses, I can bang a Wookie. And just for $240! Continue reading

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9 “Sexy” (but Disturbing) Halloween Costumes

Usually when women whore it up get dressed up for Halloween, they choose costumes embodying the typical male fantasies: sexy pirate, sexy nurse, sexy pirate nurse, etc… I’m sure there’s even a sexy astronaut costume out there for those who get an erection every time they watch Deep Impact. Continue reading

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Another Cracked Comedy Classic:5 Incredibly Impractical Sexual Fetishes

Everyone’s got their kink. Maybe you like a girl in a gold Princess Leia bikini, maybe you go a little further and make her dress up like that alien singer at Jabba’s palace. Continue reading

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New Cracked Article: Kayne West’s Travel Agency

…and other absolute batshit insane product ideas from famous brands. Kellogg’s Cereal Gangsta Wear, Burger King Cologne, Evian Water Bras for combustible boobs, baby food for sad adults and Jeff Dunham wines. It’d be so sad if it weren’t true. Wait, no, being true makes it really sad. Continue reading

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WTF of the Day: 7-Year-Olds Perform Sexy Version of “Single Ladies”

Like I’ve said before, the children are our future. And our future is full of hyper sexualized toddlers emotionally and developmentally dysfunctional thanks to parents who really, really don’t get he whole “parenting” thing. Continue reading

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