Tag Archives: Oregon

Woman “Contracts” Irish Accent after Dental Surgery

This is a real-ish thing called “foreign accent syndrome.” Continue reading

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Oregon is Number 2 in America for Largest Penises

A new study ranks US states and cities by penis size. How does your home town stack up? Continue reading

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Use More of My Oil!

Oil is my life. Oil has made me grotesquely rich. I own homes I’ve never seen. Hell, I own people I’ve never seen. But I never let my staggering crapulence get in the way of consistently delivering delicious crude to all you fine consumers. If oil is the blood of the earth, than I am the biggest, fattest mosquito around. And who doesn’t love a fat blood sucker?

So imagine my surprise when I discovered you motorists have conspired against me. Normally I spend the summers in an ether-induced coma until the holiday season arrives. But this year my man servant Chauncey woke me a month early. Continue reading

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